As I write these articles on a fairly regular basis, I sometimes wonder.
Is anybody reading this stuff?
Honestly, I really have no way of knowing unless somebody tells me. And since I’ve disabled comments on this blog (can’t handle the spam) that’s not even possible. Oh sure, I guess they could contact me via email to tell me but that’s not likely to happen either. So am I really just spitting into the wind?
Do you ever feel that way about your music? I don’t know what you do with it or where you put it up online whether it be YouTube or Soundcloud or wherever, but do you ever wonder if anybody is listening to it?
Sure, with YouTube and Soundcloud you do have counters that let you know how many times your video or sound clip was played, but is that really a true indicator of how many people are really listening? Anybody can click on your video or sound file and then walk away from their PC or whatever device they’re using to listen. Or they could maybe listen to a few seconds and then just shut it off. And hitting the “like” button doesn’t prove they really listened to the track.
Point I’m trying to make is this. Without direct contact with the person, either face to face or at the very least speaking through some type of communication device (phone, Skype, etc) the Internet is a very impersonal place and because of that, we have no real way of knowing how the person on the receiving end of our links feels.
Does it matter? If there isn’t anybody out there listening to your stuff, watching your videos, or whatever, does it make any difference to what YOU’RE going to do with your musical life?
And this, my friends, is where we get to the whole crux of the point this article is making.
Yeah, it’s great to get some validation from others that our work means something. But as a very wise person once said to me, “If you seek validation from others to make your life meaningful, you are going to be very disappointed.”
As much as I wanted to argue with this, contending that the only thing that matters in life is what others think of you, I finally realized that this just isn’t true. Sure, you don’t want the whole world to think you’re a rotten S.O.B. (or maybe you don’t even care) but the only thing that really matters is what you think of yourself. Are you being the best person that you can be? And in the case of your music, are you writing the best music that you can write?
That’s when I had to take a long hard look at myself in the mirror and I wasn’t entirely pleased with what I saw. So now it’s a little honesty time.
Am I writing the best music that I can write? The honest answer to that question is yes and no. Why yes and no? Let me explain.
I know that I’m only so talented. The other day when I went to Soundcloud and listened to some of the stuff up there (especially from this guy Doc Jon) I realized that there are people out there who are so much more talented than I am. There is just no getting around that. I am limited as far as what I was blessed with. Everything I do comes from hard work. So in that respect, what I do IS the best I can do, at least right now, because I only have so much to work with. Like I said, I have to work hard at this.
And therein lies the reason why the answer is also no.
See, because this stuff doesn’t come easy to me and it is hard work, I sometimes get a little lazy. I don’t always want to work hard. I want music to be fun all the time. Unfortunately, sometimes it’s not fun. Sometimes it’s a downright chore. On those days when I feel like that, I admit it, I sometimes cut corners. I’ll take the easy way out.
How? Here are some examples.
I’ll be laying down some tracks and I know that I probably could use a few more synths in the background at certain parts but I just don’t feel like doing the programming to get the sounds I want or write out the various parts, so I’ll listen to what I have so far, say to myself, “It’s good enough” and put it in the can. I can’t tell you how many songs I have done this with where I just don’t feel like laying down 50 tracks, even though I know that the song needs it to be really special. So I took the easy way out.
Another example is in writing the song to begin with. This is where I really get lazy sometimes. I’ll be writing the song and I’ll get to the bridge section. I’ll want it to be really good, but after trying and trying, I can’t get a chord progression that I want that will fit it just perfectly. So I finally just dig into one of my stock bridges that I might have done a dozen times before and plug it in.
Pure laziness.
Or I’ll do something like this. I’m laying down some strings on a rock track. I want them to have some reverb but not sure what kind. Then I think about all the testing that I’m going to have to do in order to find just the right reverb and I finally say “screw it!” and pull out my East West Quantum Leap Spaces module, bring up my trust Northwest Hall reverb and be done with it.
Again, pure laziness.
So if I’m being perfectly honest, no, I’m not putting out the best music I can. Would a better reverb make enough of a difference given my limited skills as a composer, arranger and producer? Not sure. Maybe, maybe not. And that’s where I need to do some soul searching.
But if I’m not putting out the best product that I can, does it matter whether anybody hears it or not? The only thing that matters is that I’m being the best that I can be.
So the cutting corners and downright laziness has to stop. I know I won’t put an end to years of habit overnight, but I have to at least take some baby steps in that direction. That should at least begin with making sure I compose the best song possible given the talent that I have.
What about you? Are you being the best that YOU can be?
For The Love Of Music,
Steven “Wags” Wagenheim